running water from your own well.
16 Should your springs overflow in the streets,
your streams of water in the public squares?
17 Let them be yours alone,
never to be shared with strangers.
18 May your fountain be blessed,
and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.
19 A loving doe, a graceful deer—
may her breasts satisfy you always,
may you ever be intoxicated with her love.
20 Why, my son, be intoxicated with another man’s wife?
Why embrace the bosom of a wayward woman?
Proverbs 5:15-20 (NLT) 15 Drink water from your own well—
share your love only with your wife.
16 Why spill the water of your springs in the streets,
having sex with just anyone?
17 You should reserve it for yourselves.
Never share it with strangers.
18 Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you.
Rejoice in the wife of your youth.
19 She is a loving deer, a graceful doe.
Let her breasts satisfy you always.
May you always be captivated by her love.
20 Why be captivated, my son, by an immoral woman,
or fondle the breasts of a promiscuous woman?
"The decision to entice someone else into immorality is not a decision made by a stable person who desires the best for either self or the one enticed." - Enduring Word Commentary
As we've been discussing in earlier posts about Proverbs 5, a woman (or man) who tries to seduce you is someone to avoid. They don't have your best interests at heart. Heck, they don't even have their own best interests at heart! They are unstable in their ways. They are living just for the moment without thought of the future. This is not just silly but dangerous. You are hurting yourself and others.
In the verses today, we learn what marriage is for. God has given us sexual desires and the desire to procreate. It's hardwired into us. I mean, think about it... God has given us sexual organs, hormones, chemical balances and there is only one reason for it! Procreation! He has made our fleshly machines to work in such a beautiful and intricate way so as to procreate.
Before the fall into sin, God had made Adam and Eve perfectly. They had perfect, immortal bodies. God breathed His life into them. Then He established a marriage relationship between them and told them to multiply, fill the earth, and rule over the earth.
Genesis 1:26-28 (NLT) 26 Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, after Our likeness, to rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, and over all the earth itself and every creature that crawls upon it.”
27 So God created man in His own image;
in the image of God He created him;
male and female He created them.
28 God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth and subdue it; rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and every creature that crawls upon the earth.”
This was BEFORE the Fall and sin entered the world. Adam and Eve were created in God's image. They were formed and designed by God. He breathed His life into them. Stop for a moment.
Everything else that God created (stars, sun, moon, earth, seas, land, animals, birds, fish), He created with a word. But when it came time to make a human being...
God used His Hands to form Adam from the dirt of the ground and He leaned over Adam and breathed His Life into Adam. Then He took a rib from Adam and used His Hands to make a woman and He leaned over her and breathed His Life into Eve. This is why Christians see human life as being sacred. We have God's image, His design, His breath in us. It is why only God should be in charge of life and death. We are His creation and we have His breath! Every human being is sacred because we are His creation.
So from the time we are babies, born into this world, our bodies begin the slow climb to sexual peak. When we are of an age to be able to have children, our bodies work in such a way as to be fruitful and multiply. Then we reach an age where our bodies begin the slow decline away from sexual peak. During sexual peak, we normally have all we need to procreate, to have babies and care for our young. For instance, it is natural for everyone in a restaurant to keep an eye on a small child or infant in order to protect it. We may get irritated when the baby cries. But normal people keep eyes in the back of their head to watch out for the child in the room. We instinctively realize a baby is vulnerable and must be taken care of because babies are the hope of our future. Most of us would risk our lives, even give up our lives, for a child. God made us that way for a purpose so that we can procreate and multiply and fill the earth.
God doesn't often give children to people who are too young or too old to take care of the babies. That's why a 5 yr old can't have children and a 50 yr old can't have children (normally speaking). We need the ability to make mature decisions, youth, strength and stamina to protect our young so God made our sexual peak to be in our late teens until our late 30's. Too early and we don't have the mental capacity to think things all the way through and that can be dangerous to our young. For instance, a 10 year old might not realize a baby crawling out the front door is dangerous because they never thought the baby would make it to the street and get run over or the baby gets snatched by a stranger. Too late and we don't have the strength and stamina to keep up with our young.
Normally and naturally, God gives children at our sexual peak for good reasons. The end result is for procreation and to protect our young so they can fill the earth and multiply themselves. Now, of course, sin came into the world and we now live with the effects of a sinful world and sinful people. So not all adults would watch after a child and some would even kidnap and molest a child. That is evil and sick. It's not how God designed the original world. Pedophiles go against every natural inclination that God built in them. They have rebelled to such an extent against God's design that sin has them in complete bondage and satan is laughing at them. We also know that not all women and men can have children. God knows what He is doing and why. They haven't failed, but a fallen world distorts God's original design. God can redeem all things and our bodies will be redeemed in the end and we will be given back our perfect, immortal bodies.
Now, back to our verses today. God designed and made our bodies to include sex and we saw the reason for sex was for procreation. God established a marriage between Adam and Eve and then told them to go forth and multiply. Your body is designed to have sex and to reach a sexual peak for a period of years. God provided a way for you to use and enjoy that experience in a safe way... marriage.
In the verses today, God is saying He provided a marriage relationship between a man and woman so they can express themselves sexually and safely. They can enjoy each other and fulfill the purpose to procreate. God created sex and He doesn't tell you not to enjoy it. He tells you to enjoy it within your marriage! It's for your own safety. It's to fulfill God's purpose of sex - to procreate. And it's to bind a husband and wife together as one so that, when they are in need, they have each other to help.
In today's world, modern people think we have removed all consequences of sex outside of marriage and they think we should be enjoying sex with anyone, anywhere, any time and with no constraints. We have created birth control and condoms and medical treatments for STDs so we can do whatever we want and disregard God's commands. But we are also finding out the devastation that sexual "freedom" brings. Freedom is the opposite of what it is! It leads to bondage, not freedom. Pornography addicts, sexual addicts, sexual perversions such as homosexuality, pedophilia, incest, bestiality, sexual violence. People become so obsessed with sex that every minute of every day is consumed with planning, grooming, searching, chatting, texting, preparing, the act, taking care of the consequences afterwards with lying, deceiving, creating alibis, etc. Our society today wants to make all of this "normal". Every TV show, movie, book, magazine, or songs talk about sex and it's perversions as normal as eating an apple pie. Why of course men go to stripper bars. Why of course, now women go to male stripper bars. Of course, men and women parties have strippers. Of course men watch pornography on their computers. Of course, young men use women and vice versa. Of course it's natural and normal to tie each other up and wear some kind of weird costumes. Of course, homosexuality is normal and a celebrated lifestyle. We should be giving them parades and surrounding them with rainbows. The world is desperately trying to make our sexual aberrations and sins acceptable and it's a "powerful delusion".
2 Thessalonians 2: 10-12 (NIV) 10 They perish because they refused to love the truth and so be saved. 11 For this reason God sends them a powerful delusion so that they will believe the lie 12 and so that all will be condemned who have not believed the truth but have delighted in wickedness.
Sin is not acceptable. God hasn't changed and His Word never changes. We think we can be God and make all sin acceptable and celebrate it. But it doesn't change the results and consequences. God loves every human being He created. He has provided a way for every human being, no matter the sin, to be forgiven and cleansed. He has given His Holy Spirit to live within us in order to enable us to keep away from sin. A built-in power that gives us all we need to say, "NO!" And, when we don't say no and we fall into it again, we can repent and ask His forgiveness again. We can start new because His mercy and grace is new every morning!
God says sex is between a husband and a wife. No other relationship has God's permission to have sex. You cannot have sex outside of marriage without consequences. But within your marriage, you may enjoy sex with your spouse. In these verses, God says we can enjoy sex. Let your wife (or husband) be a blessing to you. May you rejoice in the sex between you and your spouse. May you be intoxicated and captivated by your spouse.
Did you know that you can treat your spouse like the King or Queen of the household and the result is better sex? If you concentrate on loving, respecting and honoring your spouse, you will experience better sex as well as a deeper and more meaningful relationship. God says sex within the marriage makes us as one. It cements our relationship. The two become one. As one, we need each other. We depend on each other. We have the same heart about things. We care about what the other thinks. We want to know where the other one is and if they are safe. We share memories and experience fun times together. We also share the bad times together. My husband knows how I like my coffee and I know what he would order at a restaurant. I can order for him before he even gets there. I know he likes his tea with half sweetened and half unsweetened. He knows I don't like lettuce with my Mexican dinners and that I prefer beans over rice. We know what each other thinks and generally how they would react. Over our 42+ years of marriage, we have become one.
This oneness started with love. Sex came from that love and cemented the oneness. Our marriage has suffered many ups and downs; good times and bad times. But we've remained together because the tearing of one back into two is too devastating. I don't think I could finish my life out without wondering where he was and if he was safe. I don't think I would ever get over thinking, "Stan would enjoy this" or "Stan needs that." That's why the death of a spouse is so heartrending. It is a tearing away a part of yourself. Divorce is bad too. You don't just get over it. God created that oneness when the world was sinless. But sin brought sin and death and we suffer the consequences.
God's way is the best plan for human beings and that plan hasn't changed since Adam and Eve. It was to find your loved one, marry and enjoy sex within your marriage. It was to be fruitful and multiply. It was to take care of your family and rear godly children. Unfortunately, sinful human beings have corrupted this plan. A fallen world has death and sin in it and it corrupts the original plan. It makes me long for the day when God restores all things. He will redeem our bodies as incorruptible and He will redeem the world and heavens with a New Earth and a New Heaven. He will establish His perfection once again and those of us who are saved through Jesus Christ will enjoy His perfection for eternity! Until then, we must follow God's ways for the best possible result. It won't be perfect but it will get us as close as we can get to it.
1 Thessalonians 3:3-8 (NLT, parenthesis mine) 3 For it is God’s will that you should be holy: You must abstain from sexual immorality; 4 each of you must know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, 5 not in lustful passion like the Gentiles who do not know God; 6 and no one should ever violate or exploit his brother (or sister) in this regard, because the Lord will avenge all such acts, as we have already told you and solemnly warned you. 7 For God has not called us to impurity, but to holiness. 8 Anyone, then, who rejects this command does not reject man but God, the very One who gives you His Holy Spirit.
- Did you think sex was sinful? Did you ever realize that God created men and women for sex but within the parameters of marriage? Sex is a blessing as long as it's within God's boundaries.
- Did you realize that the world's "sexual freedom" was actually sexual bondage? Isn't it just like satan to label and advertise something totally different from reality? Journal about that and think the thought through.
- Have you found a soulmate? Did you marry him/her? Did you keep the sanctity of sex within the marriage? If you did, journal about why it was good and right. If you didn't, maybe God is leading you to repentance right now. He loves you and forgives you. Stop and pray.
- Sinners and a fallen world affect God's perfect plan. Maybe you are married but your spouse doesn't respond sexually. Maybe you can't have children. Maybe outside influences are affecting your relationship. Maybe sin is coming between the two of you. Maybe you've lost your spouse to divorce or death. None of these were God's perfect plan. But they happen due to sin and death in this world. Do believe God can redeem your situation? God is in the miracle working business and if you are trying to follow His commandments and be obedient, He can redeem any situation. "All things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose" Romans 8:28. Pray about it and try to be obedient to God's leading and guidance and watch Him redeem.
- Are you single and waiting to meet that soulmate? Be sure to wait in an attitude of gratitude and don't fall into pressure from the outside world. Some people, God calls to be single. And, believe me, it would be best to be single than to jump into marriage with the wrong person! Some people have to wait longer than others. Some people wait too long. God knows what He is doing and if you are truly submissive to His plan and you are obedient to His commands, He will do what is best for you. Be sure to pray until you feel truly submissive to His Will. We tend to be rebellious and jump into things we think we want. Be willing to accept from His Hand and not grab what we think we want and what we think is best. You and I both know we can justify anything. So stick to God's plan, be obedient, wait with submission and gratitude and watch what God has in store for you!
For all my studies on Proverbs click HERE.