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Contact me at Mom25dogs@gmail.com

Monday, June 18, 2007

Conversation Between 2 dogs and a Mommy

Setting: At the Outerbanks, on the beach.

Dresden and Capo see the beach for the first time. It's hot but the water is cold. Mommy is trying to hold 2 Iggies on leashes and take photographs and video. Mommy carries the Iggies to the hard sand and sets them down.

"Ouch! That sand is hot, Mommy. Pick me up, pick me up!" - Capo, as he paws at Mommy legs.
"Buck up little man! This is no time to be timid. Mother has brought us to the beach of Normandy to kill Germans. Where are they? Where are they?" -Dresden as he paces around and around Mommy wrapping his leash around her legs.
"Germans!" - Capo whimpers!
"Yes, Krauts, Nazis, Germans! Just point me in the right direction, Mother. I'll save the motherland. God save the Queen and all that rot!" - Dresden says with his tail up.
"Dresden, this isn't Normandy and we aren't here to kill Germans. This isn't 1941." - Mommy as she snaps pictures of the surf.
"Ye gods, the War is over?" - Dresden as he looks up quizzically.
"Yes Dresden." - Mommy
"Oh thank goodness! I was getting 'fraid Mommy!" - Capo
"Who won?" - Dresden
"England and America." - Mommy
"Then what are we doing in this god forsaken place?" - Dresden
"My question exactly." - Capo
"I wanted ya'll to see the beach for the first time and see the ocean and take pictures of you two cavorting in the waves." - Mommy said dreamily. Then she turns the camera on the boys.
"Yee gods, not water!" - Dresden yells.
"NNNOOOO!!!!" - scream Capo.
"Oh dear, now I have pictures of silly, scared dogs." -Mommy whines. She tries to maneuver the boys to the edge of the surf.
"No, I refuse to go near it!" - Dresden as he pulls on his leash.
"Me, either!" - Cap, as he pulls away in the other direction.
Meanwhile Mommy is trying to hop (because the leashes are wrapped around her legs) to the surf, hold the dogs safely and take pictures.
"Ooooooo! Something cold and wet is on my feet and legs." - groaned Capo.
"Yikes, it's so cold!" - shivered Dresden.
"Oh, it's fun, boys." - Mommy said as she changed from her camera to her video camera. She raises it up to film the ocean and she see people swimming. They are laughing at her and the dogs. - "Oops, we're making a spectacle of ourselves, boys."
"I don't care, let's go back to the hotel. This water stuff is scary." - Capo
"I second that motion. Let's retreat rapidly!" - Dresden
"But boys, you haven't cavorted in the waves." - Mommy, as she tried to videotape two wet, shivering dogs tied around her legs.
"Eek! Here it comes again." - squealed Capo
"Mother, I refuse to 'cavort'! Now, like the cowboys used to say, 'Let's get the heck out of Dodge!'" - Dresden
"OK, OK! Gimme a chance to unwind these leashes from around my legs." - Mommy says as she puts her camera away. - "Besides, I think I've ruined my expensive sandles."
Mommy sets the camera bag down, picks a boy up under each arm, grasps the camera bag in her fingers and flounders through the hot, soft sand back to the car.
"Let me wipe your paws with this towel to dry you off and get the sand off your toes." - Mommy
"It's your fault we are in this sandy shape." - sniffs Dresden.
"Just get it off! Get it off!" - Capo whines
"OK, now you're clean, we'll go back to the hotel." - Mommy as she cranks the car up.
"Next time please ask us before you assume we'd like to do something." - says Dresden as he snuggles on Mommy's lap.
"I'm just glad I didn't have to kill some family." - says Capo as he turns around three times in the passenger seat and settles down.
"Kill a family?" - asks a bewildered Mommy.
"Yeah, you know that family named Germans. The father was Kraut German, the mother was Nazi German and a little baby German." - said Capo sleepily as he tucks his nose and goes to sleep.
"Silly little man, thinking the Germans were a family." - snorts Dresden as his eyes begin to close.
"Yes, silly little boys." - Mommy says as she pats their heads and drives back to the hotel.

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